Do flies have radar?
10/12/03 11:55 AM
Flies . Did you ever notice (of course you did) that every time you reach for the fly swatter the flies leave the area? As soon as you put the swatter down they come back. Kind of like: "buzz, buzz" – reach for the fly swatter – fly away; "buzz, buzz" – reach for the swatter – fly away, etc.
I finally figured it out. There is no doubt in my mind that when flies are born they have sensors that are automatically activated to protect (them during their entire miserable lifetime) from those of us who find absolutely nothing about them cute. I have determined that these sensors were the invention of a fatally swatted fly (reincarnated into human form) whose mission is to save his "sisters" and "brothers".
Many of you will remember the fly swatters that were home constructed out of pieces of old rubber like that from an inner tube (with no holes to emit sound) that has been attached to a piece of an old broomstick by wire or bailing twine, or whatever was available. They were very deadly and this is how the reincarnated fly/human was killed. Now it is time for the fly/human to get even.
His invention was the swatter with dozens of little square holes cut into the piece of rubber (preferably red or yellow to make it easier to spot from a distance). You can chase a fly away a gazillion times and it ALWAYS. comes back, but you just pick up a swatter and the fly will not come back until after you lay the swatter down. Right? Yes, I am
My theory is that all of the little holes in the swatter emit sound waves (oh my gosh … could this be the speed of sound thing I didn’t think I would ever need to know!!??) every time a swatter is moved, activating the sensors to warn the flies of impending danger. So that’s why we almost always got the fly when we used newspapers … no holes to create sound waves. What is the message here? Beats me, but since we don’t use old newspapers in outhouses anymore and the days of soaking them in water and rolling them up as tight as possible to dry into fireplace logs is long past, maybe we can renew and old use for them. Make fly swatters!