Bill
now helps others cross over
As we sat watching the ice
skaters last Saturday afternoon, the phone rang. The voice on the other end
asked for Barbara and introduced himself as Gene Thin Elk. What a wonderful
surprise! I had been wanting to meet and talk with him to get some insight into
why our son Bill, as he lay dying, chanted in Lakota ...twice. Mr. Thin Elk said
we could talk about that later, but there was another reason for his calling me.
He told me
there was a young man in Vermillion named Adam who was dying of AIDS and was on
his last three or four days. Friday night as everyone was gathered around Adam,
Bill came to Mr. Thin Elk. He asked Gene to "call Mama and tell her I'm okay and
tell her what I'm doing." He (Bill) went on to explain that he was there for
Adam and would stay with him and help him make the transition to the other side.
"That's what I'm doing now, helping AIDS patients through the light."
He said, "Tell Mama I'm a cop now, she'll know what that means." Then went
on to describe the uniform he wears. Gene said Bill told him that Adam was in
his final stages and could no longer see and could hear very little, but he was
aware that the room was filled with love and everyone was there with him. Bill
said there was something he wanted Gene to tell the group.
They were to light a purple candle and remain there with Adam, all the
while talking to him and
touching him. "Someone should be holding his hand at all times, rubbing it and
singing to him and
when the time comes, I will help him through the light." Then, before he left,
he reminded Gene to
be sure to "call Mama and tell her I'm a cop, she'll know what that means."
I'm not too sure what that means, but it will come to me one day. What I
do know is the relief I
felt to know Bill had finally made contact. Didn't matter with whom the contact
was made ... he made
contact ... that's the important thing. And yes, that is what he would be doing;
helping people dying with AIDS make the transition through the light.
The clincher for me was the fact that he said for Gene to tell "Mama". Bill
was the only one of our children who called me "Mama." What Gene described as
Bill's instructions to the group with Adam, is what happened in our house during
Bill's last three days and his last 24 hours.
Some of you know what I'm talking about and have experienced just such a
thing as I've described, while some of you know I have to be crazy, but you know
... it is a matter of what works, and this works for me.
There have been times during this life span of mine (as well as yours, I'm
sure) when unexplainable things happen while we're alone in the house, or
driving down a road, standing by the stove cooking dinner or resting or asleep,
whenever, that nags at us all day. As a general rule, we just brush these
incidents off with a pooh-pooh. Or, we can go with it, let it happen and see
what develops. Nothing real exciting happens except the reward of having been
"visited."
I didn't understand "visits" in my twenties or early thirties and how
I wish I had been aware. I can think of two occasions when I could have enjoyed
being visited by my dad, but just brushed them off as "really eerie dreams." I
would like to encourage anyone who may have experienced being visited by a
deceased loved one to share your story.
Miss your mother, father, child, someone? Open yourself up for a
visit. Don't expect to think about it so hard you can conjure someone up ... it
doesn't work that way. If you just open your heart and sub-conscience, some day,
when you least expect it, some little warm thing will happen and their name will
pop into your head. Let it happen.
When I shared my new Bill and Adam story with my pastor I was told it was a
joyous day and Bill's describing what happened in our house (as the steps to be
taken for Adam) confirmed for me that the way we handled his dying and death
was the right way.
It also relieved a little nagging at the back of my heart about the
cremation. It was his wish and we all know where he went. Now I know cremation
allows you to come back, too. Thanks Gene for sharing Bill's visit.
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